Our sweet sister, Monica Mary “Cups” Duffey, the heart and soul of our family of nine children, passed away on July 28, 2024. We are brokenhearted but take comfort in the belief that she is now reunited with our parents, Tom and Joanne Duffey, who loved her immeasurably.

She was born in 1959, into a world without high-risk obstetricians and fetal heart monitors. Due to complications during delivery, and after some initial tests, the doctors told our parents to take her home and love her but she would never walk or talk.

But walk and talk she did, reciting the lyrics of every conceivable pop and R&B song ever recorded in the sixties and seventies, and charging hard at the doors of every nearby Target, Walmart and Barnes & Noble, where she loved to while her afternoons away. At home, she adored old TV shows and found joy in jigsaw puzzles and Penny Press crossword puzzles. She loved everything purple, and a Friday night highlight was dining at Culver’s. Her music collection was vast but she had a special fondness for Petula Clark, The Righteous Brothers and Brenda and The Tabulations.

Monica was cherished by her four brothers, Joe, Tom, Dan and Peter Duffey and four sisters, Maureen Nelson, Tessa Gingrass, Anne Bolles and Katie Moore. She was a sister-in-law to 8, aunt to 21 and great aunt to 17 – and that adds up to dozens and dozens of lives Monica touched and made better. She was an inspiration to us all, our family’s single greatest success story, exceeding every expectation and teaching each and every one of us to be more loving and accepting human beings.

We’ll celebrate Monica’s life on Friday, August 9th, from noon to 3:30pm, with time of remembrance at 1:30pm at Birch, 6610 West North Avenue in Wauwatosa, and we invite you to join us.

Monica spent more than 50 years at St. Coletta of Wisconsin, where she was surrounded by compassionate caregivers who enriched her life with their kindness and dedication. We are deeply grateful for the love and care she received there especially Norris House and Padua House staff – they are truly angels!! In honor of Monica’s memory, we kindly ask for donations to be made to St. Coletta of Wisconsin, ensuring that their wonderful work continues to touch the lives of others as it did for Monica. Please click on the link to donate https://www.stcolettawi.org/monica-duffey/

But the greatest thing you can do to honor Monica’s life is to go out into your world and connect with those who face developmental disabilities or other challenges. You will discover that they have much more to give to you than you can ever give to them.